Category: iBelieve.com Contributing Writer

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4 Signs You’re in an Unhealthy Friendship

“A friend loves at all times.” Proverbs 17:17

Friendship is often seen at face value, much like this popular verse. On the surface, a friendship may look peaceful and perfect, promised to go the way it’s supposed to go, without a hitch or hiccup. We need our tribe to support us. This is often where we get it wrong. Friendships falter when we loft them above our relationship with Christ.

The entirety of Proverbs 17:17 reads, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” The definition of adversity is littered with words like “unfavorable, misfortune, clarity, distress, and unfortunate.” Adversity is a circumstance or condition. Proverbs 17:17 is speaking of a life altering, life changing, season. We are promised to many marking moments on earth, and not every friend will be active in every season. When we live life scrambling to find friends to mend the broken and shifting pieces, we fall out of alignment, and it can damage our friendships. Here are four signs of unhealthy friendship.

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Meg

10 Harmful Types of Friends and How to Set Boundaries with Each

I just can’t wait to be friends with everyone!” My friend, more reserved than my hyperactive, people loving self, laughed as if I’d lost my mind. The infamous mantra sticks nearly two decades later. When we seek God’s standard for friendship, and follow Jesus’ example, the Holy Spirit will help us spread the love of Jesus.

But what about unhealthy friendships? What is God’s standard for our friendship with those who drain our energy, deplete our resources and leave us feeling stressed and frustrated? God’s Word speaks truth into all of our relationships, and there is wisdom to be found for how to deal with that friendship that isn’t quite as healthy as it could be.

Here are 10 potentially unhealthy types friends, and how to love them within the good boundaries God has given us. 

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Meg

These Revelations Changed How I Think about Friendship

Every friendship begins with a hint of selfishness that we all innately possess. But if we learn to flip our vision outward in obedience to God and service to others, His purpose for friendship is revealed.

Jesus set the bar. He came to serve, not to be served. What did that look like in His earthly friendships? He was open to conversation with anyone, friendly with everyone, but held 12 people closer than others. And Jesus knew the best way to befriend someone was occasionally to confront them with the truth, even if it wasn’t what they wanted to hear. He had to allocate His time and manage relationships just as we do on this earth.

What else can we learn from Him and apply to our lives? Here are 10 revelations that have the power to transform friendships.

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Meg

A Prayer for the Heartbroken and Lonely on Valentine’s Day

In a matter of days after Christmas passes, the retail industry shifts from Christmas trees to heart-shaped chocolate boxes. Those in love embrace Valentine’s Day as another reason to celebrate, while others nurse broken hearts and mourn seasons of loneliness. This may be the year a man spends his first Valentine’s Day without his wife of over fifty years. It could be the premiere of a mom’s new, separated life and broken family. For someone else, the occasion may signify the inaugural holiday since the diagnosis. Others scroll through life wishing for more. Some clutch tightly to the smiles they are fighting for.

Few get to celebrate a soul-filling love. Christ is all we need to live a full life, yet we seek satisfaction from our earthly relationships. We craft, build, counsel, seek, and pedestal-place our significant others and spouses where they are bound to fall. Where do we turn? How do we heal? Does God care about our broken hearts, tear-stains and cracked promises?

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Meg

Why Your Friendships Change When You Reach Midlife (And What You Can Do About It.)

Friendship is a channel of Jesus’ love extended to and through us. Each phase of life comes with a new battering ram and a different perspective. As we get older, we have the potential to view life through a wiser lens. Experience on earth’s soil brings us closer to God when we continue to seek Him through it, daily.

Friendships change with the phases of life that we go through. Some friendships shift and change characteristics, and others grow alongside each other. By midlife, friendships may have seen a few phases of change.

Proverbs 17:17 says “A friend loves at all times.” Sometimes this is more difficult than it was before, but friendship within the love of Christ is worth the effort. These friendships help us traverse through each season of our lives.

Here are 10 reasons why friendships change around midlife and what you can do about it. Click here to continue reading …