I’m a Browns fan. Thankfully I”m a distance runner and have a natural appetite for pain and discomfort…otherwise, I don’t know if I’d have the guts and stamina it takes to stick it out as a life-long Browns fan. It takes a different breed to handle all the disappointing seasons…and absent-someone stole our team seasons… with the grace and charisma that we Cleveland fans do. Settling for discreet heckling at every tailgate…up and down the ramps in and out of home games…battery throwing…beer spilling…just minor lash outs in the midst of the debacle that is our hometown world of professional sports. Trust me. It could be worse. No, really.
Despite the fact that they almost ruined the entire NFL season for me this year by how bad they suck at every aspect of the game of football, I still instill the proper football values in my house by teaching my two young daughters how to bark at the TV every Sunday. This was yet another “At least we have a team” year. And for the duration of the season, I’m going to root for the quarterback that I wish we would have been able to draft (I told you ALL he was going to be good…doubters!!!)….Tebow. However, lets face it…we are a quarterback wrecking ball. He probably would have been awful here. Everybody is.
So why stay a fan? Why not just jump ship and put on a black and gold jersey…ugh…I’m sorry. I just puked in my mouth writing that…even though there’s no way it would ever happen…even in a bad dream. Yuck. Let me re-phrase that.
So why stay a fan? Why not just jump ship and put on a Bears jersey and call it a day? Cut my losses…move on to a winner. Oh, wait…I know why…because I’m from Cleveland and not a gutless flip flopper! That’s why.
The Browns may never be good. We Browns fans that we are most likely cursed worse than the Yankees of old. But that’s no justification…I feel…for the swarm of Denver and Steeler jerseys at the grocery store, today. I was more than tempted to be confrontational about it…I didn’t have the girls with me…but I I’d just come off as a disgruntled Browns fan, right? And that would have been accurate. And I”m not interested in making a Steeler fan’s day. So, I silently cursed them out in my head as I checked out and went on my merry way.
Lucky for them. Bri follows my lead when I outwardly grumble about the neighbors dogs barking 24/7 every day of my life. “Mom, that stupid dog,” she now says whenever they ‘bother’ her while she’s outside playing. So proud. Let her at a Steeler’s fan.
Hopefully, it’ll all be worth it for Browns fans one day. All those home games filled with more Steeler fans than Browns fans. All the ridicule and ‘factory of sadness’ truth of the matter. The close losses, and the not-so-close losses. The constant turnstile of quarterbacks that have been welcomed to our glorious city…and the heckled right the #$%^& back out 6 month later. All the times we sit and watch Pittsburgh win. (time out to puke.) With an Ohio-born quarterback (trader forever…double puke.). Watching the Saints finally win and the Lions finally win…
For now I”m happy to watch ‘Big Ben’ embarrass himself in is post interview in the most ridiculous pseudo mobster get up…hat down over his eyes to disguise his weeping…I’ve ever seen. Ahhh…comedy at it’s best.
It’ll all be worth it someday. It could be next year. Yep. Maybe next year. Superbowl baby. WOOF.